Dallas Cowboys Fan Vows to Perform Outrageously Gross Act if Team Fails to Win Super Bowl 59

Dallals Cowboys fan Jordan Garnett speaking (left). Cowboys players celebrating a touchdown (right).
Jordan Garnett and Dallas Cowboys (Photos via jordangarnett.com TikTok and Getty Images)

A Dallas Cowboys fan has promised to consume the most nauseating thing imaginable if his team doesn’t win Super Bowl 59.

For the Dallas Cowboys organization, practically every year is “Super Bowl or bust.” Jerry Jones’ squad hasn’t played in the NFC Championship Game since 1995, however, which also marks the last year they won the Super Bowl.

Cowboys fan Jordan Garnett posted a video on TikTok where he vowed to eat human poop if they don’t win Super Bowl 59.

Garnett was inspired by a Florida State Seminoles fan who promised to eat dog droppings if their team lost to Boston College. The Eagles upset FSU 28-13, and the fan has since deactivated their X/Twitter account:

We the Fans - Dallas Cowboys

“I’m gonna top you, Mr. FSU. If the Cowboys do not win the Super Bowl this year…I will actually eat human feces. Human s**t. I will human s**t. That’s how confident I am that the Cowboys are going all the way this year. Bet on it.”

Garnett got a tattoo of the Dallas Cowboys winning Super Bowl 51 in the 2016 season, and another the following year when they fell short of the ultimate goal. The Cowboys didn’t win a single playoff game over those two seasons, but Garnett at least didn’t vow to human feces ahead of time.Cowboys fans leave AT&T Stadium in droves before the fourth quarter vs.  Packers | Marca

Well, Mr. Garnett, let’s just say that social media will not forget your vow if the Cowboys don’t win it all this season. So if he changes his mind, Garnett might want to delete that video before the postseason.

The Cowboys kick off their 2024 season with a road tilt against Myles Garrett’s Cleveland Browns on Sunday afternoon. The game also marks Tom Brady’s first as an analyst for the “NFL on FOX.”

Though Jerry Jones is known for being awfully patient with his coaches and players, one can only assume that drastic changes will transpire if the team fails to go on a deep postseason run.

Mike McCarthy and Dak Prescott are in their contract years. Might Jones decide to let one or both of them go if the Cowboys can’t at least reach the NFC title game? There’s no telling what kind of changes will occur if the Cowboys disappoint again.

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